Your Journey

   I just wanted to write and let everyone know how things are going. The house is starting to come together. There were a few things that had to be done to it, and I had a lot more things than I thought, but it’s almost finished now. For a while there, I was starting to wonder if any of this was worth it. I had this house that I had seen so much potential in, but when we actually started working on it, it didn’t seem like it would ever be how I pictured it in my mind. Maybe my fantasy of what my place would be like was just that, or at least it was starting to seem that way. Fortunately, I’m starting to see glimpses of what I pictured in my mind. The living room is coming together nicely. My office is almost exactly how I pictured it, and the bedrooms are incredible. The media room is even better than I thought it would be. I still have some work to do. A lot of chemicals need to be put in the pool, and one room still has to be painted, but I see it now. That’s a rare thing for me. I’m somewhat of a dreamer. I think up ideas and write them down, but I never get to actually experience them outside of my stories. Things are starting to change in that area. My ideas are finally taking shape, and it feels really good. It’s not a big deal for some people, but the last year and a half have meant the world to me. I’ve gotten to see characters in my head turn into something concrete. There was nothing like being able to hold my first book in my hands and know that it was the representation of everything I had dreamed about for so long. This is similar. I had an image of what life should be like. I should have success, a house, and someone special. The success part is coming along slowly but surely. There are no guarantees in writing, and I’m still teetering on the edge of knowing whether this will be my lifetime career, but I can see how it could be. With every day, that dream gets closer. I have the house I needed, and things have been more promising in the hunt for finding someone great. I’ve been concentrating so much on books and houses over the last year and a half, so I feel like that journey is just getting started. Still, it shows promise. I can see an outline of how it should be, and for the first time in a while, I’m hopeful in the three major areas of my life.

   You might wonder why I’m writing about this. After all, I’ve talked about books, goals, and relationships a lot. Here’s the truth. This blog is very new for me. I’ve always known how things should be in my life, but it always seemed like a very far away goal that was unattainable for someone like me. I’ve always thought I deserved good things and people in my life, but I never had the confidence to know that I could make that a reality. Even now, I have doubts, but they’re fading. Like I said, I can see it all coming into focus, and surprisingly, I love it. I’ve almost made this place exactly what I need, and writing could be a lifetime job with promise. I’ve got one down and another that I’m starting to believe in. As for the final goal, it can finally get the focus it always deserved now.

   I probably could have written something political or deep on here today, and I really thought about it, but I wanted to tell everyone something simple. It can get better. Life is a struggle more often than anything, but every once in a while, you get glimpses of exactly what you’re working for. It’s those moments when you remember why you’re doing everything you’ve been doing. I guess what I’m saying is this. Hold on. I’ve had night after night where it seemed like my dreams were nothing more than wishes. I had a plan, but that seemed to mean nothing. I had worked, prayed, and even pleaded for what I felt like I deserved. Life usually gives you what you need a little late, but if you’ve already stuck it out this long, there’s no need in checking out or quitting on your dreams before you finally get to see the reward at the end of a long project or search. I’m not at the end yet, but I am at a unique point that makes it all worth it. I can see the finish line, and for the first time in a while, I know it all means something. Remember that. It all means something. Your hopes and dreams don’t die until you completely quit on them. Take one step toward your ultimate goals every day, and don’t make the mistake I used to. This isn’t a race. Don’t think you’re going to get to where you need today or even this year. Work hard, but take time to truly take in all you’ve done. If you really look at where you started instead of how far away from your goals you still are, you might find that you’ve gone a lot further than you ever thought you could. I’m over halfway. I’ll continue to make new goals, so my race will never truly be done, but it can be amazing to truly see how much ground you can cover if you simply let yourself enjoy the journey to your destination.