Mistakes

   Today I want to talk to you about a quote that I read from Dave Grohl. For those who don’t know, he was the drummer of Nirvana and is currently the front man of the Foo Fighters. To say the least, I love his music. He’s one of the few artists who still writes every note and every line by traditional means and not with a computer, which I respect as someone who’s dabbled in music. Anyway, enough geeking out about music. There was a point to this. I’m not sure when Dave said this, but I think it was in 2007. Here is the quote.

   “I’d like to imagine I won’t end up in Hell, but I think I’ve done too much acid and listened to too much death metal to sit on a cloud next to God with angels floating above my head.”

   That made me think. Are we really ever too far gone? It’s a valid question. I know we’re taught that we’re always redeemable, but what about when we’ve done enough bad in our lives that we don’t feel worthy of Heaven or just a relationship with God? What then? That’s when we’re too far gone because we’ve set this standard of how great we have to be to deserve Heaven or how great God’s chosen people must be compared to us. If you’re one of those people who doesn’t feel worthy, I want to show you something today. These are God’s chosen people’s track records.

   Noah, a man God chose to be one of the last people on earth, got drunk, passed out naked, and then when his son didn’t help him, he cursed his grandson as a punishment. Think about that for a second. HE chose to get drunk, get naked, and then he cursed someone else for it all. Now, I know it’s not as simple as I make it sound, but God’s chosen person in that situation doesn’t exactly sound perfect.

   Let’s look at Lot now. He was allowed to leave a city being destroyed because he was deemed worthy. This same man got drunk and slept with his daughters. Really think about that for a second. Does he sound like an overly great guy to you?

   Also, do a little reading on who Paul was back when he was called Saul. Don’t forget that Moses was a murderer, too, and Jesus pretty much surrounded himself with some of the worst people you can think of. Murderers, tax collectors, and a prostitute were all among Jesus’s friends. Now, I might have given you the impression that I’m just bashing on people from the Bible. I’m not. I’m just trying to point out something. It doesn’t matter to God what you’ve done in the past. You’ve never done too much wrong (or acid in Dave’s case.) The men and women of the Bible were people of action, and sometimes that action was very good. We tell our children stories about those good actions, but many times their actions were horrible and beyond what we would even do. God’s chosen people oftentimes made more mistakes than we do today, and yet many of us feel unworthy of His love. Why? Why do we think that the only way to be a “good Christian” is to be a person of nonaction. Yes, I know that’s not a word, but I’m using it, and you’re probably wondering what I mean by it. Well, here it is, and some Christians might not like to hear it. Many believers have fallen into the trap of thinking that not sinning is an action we do for God. They think that if they don’t curse or think impure thoughts that they’re somehow cleaner than the rest of society. It’s as if their nonaction is an action in their eyes, and doing nothing is never an action. God doesn’t expect us to be perfect, but he does expect us to be proactive in our belief in him. If you’re struggling with a past that makes you feel unworthy today, I want you to do something. Let it go. Sometimes you have to go to those dark places to know you don’t want to go back. You tried things, made mistakes, and have regrets. That tells me you messed up, but it also tells me you’re a creature of action. Those are the types of people God uses. He doesn’t use the ones who bury their heads in the sand because they’re too afraid to make a mistake or be seen with a person who’s taken a dark path. Believers of action live their lives and spread the word of God all while being as imperfect as they ever were. Faith doesn’t mean perfection or that it’s expected. It just means you have the belief that your life can mean something through God regardless of what came before you knew Him or what might come after.

   If you’re a man or woman of action, I can guarantee you this. You’ll make mistakes, and people will question your faith because you don’t bury your head in the sand and sit at home in a safe environment, but you’ll also spread your beliefs more than anyone who sits there all day judging people for their actions while doing nothing at all themselves. Your faith will be bipolar. Throughout your life, you’ll make huge mistakes, but you’ll get up again and find a way to spread the love and joy of your God to far more corners of the earth than anyone who is afraid to go to the places you’ve been to. You’ve been tested, and you’ve failed miserably, but in that failure, you’ve learned what not to do, how to talk to people who are in the place you used to be, and what it means to yearn for something so much more. You are worthy of God’s love, and even if you don’t believe it, you’re the type of person God chooses to use when He needs someone most.

   So that’s my post for today. Make mistakes, learn, and never forget that redemption doesn’t mean perfection. It means letting God help you back up every time you fall. It’s not quitting and knowing that God can love you as perfectly flawed as you are.

Caring

   I haven’t written a blog in a while, and honestly, I haven’t been as involved with social media or people in general. Actually, I’ve only left my house a handful of times over the last two weeks. I’ve been going through a lot of things. I stopped and looked at my life about a month ago, and what I saw wasn’t good. I have so much doubt in who I am and what I do. I’ve realized something, though. I’m going to share it with you today.

   All of my problems don’t really revolve around my failures. They’re actually about one simple fact. I made a huge mistake about a year ago. I started caring. I know what you’re thinking. Why is it so bad to care? Here’s why. I’ve started caring about how people think I look, what they think of my writing, if I’m saying the right things, if I’m where I’m supposed to be at this point in my life, and if I’m the perfectly good person I’m supposed to be. Here’s the problem. I’m not perfect in any of those areas, and I keep trying to be. Every time someone criticizes me or makes fun of me, I take it as a challenge to be better. It makes everything feel like work. I have to wear the right clothes, eat the right foods, work out an appropriate amount of time, write what people tell me they want to hear instead of what’s inside me, constantly beat myself up about the bad things I do and say, and maybe worst of all, compare myself to everyone else my age and ask am I where they are? It’s a horrible feeling because no matter what you do, you never live up to who you’re supposed to be. It can drive you mad. It can make you avoid writing, going out, looking in a mirror, or even praying. It makes you constantly feel less than everyone else because people always complain, no matter what you do.

   Now, all of this might seem like one big complaint, but it’s really not. It’s just an acknowledgement that a long time ago I didn’t care what anyone thought. I liked people, and I would have preferred that they liked me and my writing, but I was just me for better or worse. I liked me. Fat or skinny, moral or devilish, talented or a delusional dreamer - it was all just me, and I was fine with that because I didn’t care. I didn’t care what other people wrote, where they were in their lives, or what they thought of me because I was living in my world, and it was such a happier place. So here’s me finally saying it. I don’t care. I’m going to be me. I’m going to write, be an emotional wreck who probably doesn’t get married until he’s forty, pair eating too much with a crazy amount of exercise, go out in very comfortable and stretchy clothing, and have a spiritual relationship that can only be described as bipolar. Sometimes I feel like that’s what I am in every area. At times I’m on top of the world, and at others, I feel like I’m buried beneath it. It’s time to smile again and maybe even cry when it’s necessary. It’s time for it to be okay for me not to be perfect or what anyone wants me to be. I wish the same for you. May none of us care to change who we are until one day we find people who we don’t have to care around because they love us exactly as we are.

Fatigue

   I’m going to tell you something today that you’ve waited to hear your whole life. Stop! That’s right. Just stop. It sounds simple enough, but for most of us, it’s actually pretty hard. We spend almost a third of our lives working, and then another third goes toward our family (kids, your spouse, family reunions, and all those favors your relatives want). If you’re really lucky, you’re able to sneak in an hour of television or a workout after all that. Then you go to sleep, and your day is over. You might remember a time when you loved your job or didn’t secretly resent all the tasks you had to do with the people who you truly love. That time is long gone, though, and it’s because you’ve been running yourself ragged. The solution is pretty simple. Stop. No, I’m not talking about quitting your job or abandoning your family, but there is a way to keep your sanity and find the joy in your routine all over again.

   The first thing you need to do is have a convenient sick day or vacation. Do you remember when you were a kid and you skipped school? Everyone said how irresponsible you were, and you got into a lot of trouble if you got caught, but that teenager might have been smarter than the adult you grew into. He or she couldn’t stand to be in that classroom for one more moment, so you weren’t. You had a day to decompress, and when you had to get back to it, it was easier. The same goes for family. A trusted babysitter or a day away from your partner can actually go a long way. Don’t believe me? Try it. I’m doing that right now . . . or I will be once I finish up this blog. I’ve decided to take a day or two off from writing and talking to anyone that I don’t desire to. It sounds selfish in a world where we’re constantly bombarded with responsibilities, and we always have to keep up with the competition, but I’ll come back more productive than ever. On day one, I’ll get rid of the headache I’ve been sporting for the last two weeks, and on day two, I’ll start to miss writing and certain people. By day three, I’ll actually appreciate what I do again. For a month or two, it won’t be a job anymore, and then I’ll just have to take a day or two all over again.

   Maybe stopping what you’re doing isn’t the easiest thing in the world, though. Maybe a lot of people count on you, and your significant other and your kids wouldn’t know what to do without you. Maybe your boss is clueless, and you pretty much hold the place you work together. If that’s the case, then some planning might be in order. Communicate to the people you love in a nice way that you’re burned out. Then plan around the most important parts of your lives. Find two days that can just be about you. If they won’t give you that, then your problem might be a little deeper than being burned out.

   You might wonder why I thought to write about this. It’s something I’ve been struggling to do. I, along with many Americans, often feel like we’ve got to keep up with the status quo. If the average author writes x amount of words per day, then I think I should, too, and if normal twenty-six year olds go out every Friday, I feel like when I don’t, I’m a failure. Here’s the truth about me right now, though. I don’t want to write anything, and the only place I want to go is to my bed. That’s the one relationship I really miss. I’ve definitely been neglecting sleep. We think of life as a race so often, but if we slow down and just do what we want, we often find that we see it much more clearly. The work we do is often a joy when we feel like we don’t have to do it, and the people in our lives are there because we chose them, not for us to serve them. Somewhere in the middle of all that is us, too. We still exist, believe it or not. The kid who used to be selfish and blow off all his responsibilities is still in there, and guess what? He wants at least ten percent of your time, and when you give that time, your mind will be clearer, you’ll work better, be a much more loving person, and you’ll see life for exactly what it is. It’s not a race or competition. It’s the most interactive story in the universe where you pick what happens next. It can be a grind, or it can be the most amazing playground filled with as much love, accomplishment, and even individuality that you can comprehend.

Wrong Visions Vol. 3

   I want to tell everyone a little about the final Wrong Visions today. I originally started these collections of short stories as a private thing for myself. I wasn’t ready to let go of the Wrong and Strange Visions characters, so I wrote these, but I quickly found out that some people still wanted to see a little more out of them, too. This is the end of the short stories, though. It was a difficult thing to write because of that. You don’t always know how to say goodbye to your favorite characters or if you’re even doing them justice. After editing and reading these final stories back, I’m confident that this is exactly the way to end what has been a great joy for me. Let me tell you a little about each story.

   Wrong Direction shows us a slightly older Nathan and Sam. It’s a story about a husband and wife who have gotten lost in all the daily tasks that life throws our way. They feel like a shell of who they used to be, and they make a decision to change that. It serves as a great reintroduction to these characters and sets up all the events of the rest of the volume.

   Wrong Wishes follows Dan Driver as a few of his wishes come true. It was always boring as a police officer, and all he did was write tickets. A murder in their little community changes all of that, and Dan is forced to question what he really wants out of life. It’s a great final story for Dan and Taylor, and it gives a character who hasn’t had enough time at the forefront a stage of his own.

   Strange Visions: A Gift’s End is about Trent. When he loses his gift, he’s forced to question how much of the good things in his life are just a result of his abilities. Can he still be a lawyer and the husband Ally has always known? For that matter, can he even help Robert and Megan anymore? This is Trent’s journey to discovering his true worth, and it’s definitely one worth taking.

   Wrong Time Right Guy is a story from Emma’s perspective. This story is unique to the Wrong series. It’s a teen romance at heart. I’ve wanted to explore the children in this series for a while, and this was a great opportunity to do that. I think this was one of the best entries in the series, and it mirrors the design I used in a future book called Destiny. Emma’s first taste of love is definitely a cute story worth reading.

   Wrong Trip follows all the characters as they get together one last time in an action packed adventure. As Nathan and Sam try to relive their glory days, they might just find that they’re not the people they used to be, and as Trent and Ally try to guide them to the conclusion that they need to stop pursuing danger, they find that a part of them might just miss who they once were. This was a story I loved writing because I got to bring my favorite characters together in a fun and exciting way that gave closure to everyone’s stories.

   Strange Visions: Our Goodbye is my personal goodbye to these characters. As Ally has to say goodbye to old memories and places, we relive what made this series great before letting it go. It’s a moving story, but in typical Strange Visions fashion, it leaves you feeling good by the end.

   Wrong: Just The Beginning is my goodbye to the Wrong gang. When tragedy hits Nathan and Sam’s little community, they have to question just what the future could hold. Is everything coming to an end or is it just the beginning? It’s the perfect goodbye for them and this author.

   Now that you know what the stories are about, I want to tell you a little about what this process was like for me. It was like saying goodbye to my best friends, and I put off doing it for a long time. The last volume of Wrong Visions was released quite a while ago, and there’s a reason for that. I didn’t want to start writing this until I knew I could truly leave it behind. I’ve found a new niche in writing romance and sci-fi. I’ll tell you more about those projects later, but I’m ready. I’m sure I’ll come back to the spy and detective genres sooner or later, but I’m excited for what’s to come. I’ll always be coming up with little stories about these characters, but it’s time to let the other stories I’ve got rolling around in my head see the light of day. I hope you’ll all read this last volume. Regardless, the Wrong Visions series has helped me personally so much. It’s been great going back to these characters, and I truly hope you’ve all enjoyed it as much as me.

   I’ll have more news soon about what I’m working on, new releases, and just off the wall things I think about. Things are looking up for me now. I’ve got a new book coming out, two really great projects that are almost finished, and another that’s starting to come together. I love creating so much. I hope I get to do this forever. Thanks for reading. You guys are the only reason I ever got to do it in the first place. Here’s to you and everyone who makes our dreams come true.