Wednesday, June 25, 2014

Hey you!

   Hey you! I’m here. I’m that person you’ve been talking over. Your voice grows louder as if conversations were a competition for who can speak louder instead of who actually has original ideas to share. Your rudeness drowns out a thought that could save the life of the person who utters it, but instead, I stuff it down. People like me aren’t heard. We’re polite. We don’t interrupt or argue. We discuss and listen.
   Hey you! I’m the person you shaped. You taught me how life was supposed to be. You said I should be a shining example and never settle for someone who was less than God would want from me. I’m now the person you tell to settle. You say “no one’s perfect” while never seeing that perfection was never a requirement. Respect, loyalty, love, and enough moral fiber to avoid the easiest of pitfalls is all I seek, but still, I remain alone. It’s as if the world has gone mad, and in the madness, all I ever hear from the ones who taught me how to live life is to join in on the craziness that poisons our very existence.
   Hey you! I’m the one you sabotaged. You said writing was a dog-eat-dog business, and I learned that lesson from someone who could have been a friend. Your jealousy speaks volumes about a few who make all writers look petty and shallow. Your attempts nearly destroyed something I had loved since I was fourteen. The very act of writing kept a gun away from my head at one point, and you had the nerve to try to take that away from someone who had NOTHING else.
   Hey you! I’m the one who was supposed to be a friend. You called me your best friend for longer than I care to remember, but all it took was one thing you didn’t agree with to shatter everything. Your lack of understanding and nihilistic belief that you had any say in my life was a testament to your lack of ability to truly love anyone who wasn’t you. Still, you taught me. My heart hardened. I didn’t trust anymore. I couldn’t.
   Hey you! You’re the one who said you wanted to be with me. When others thought I was overweight, you were also the one to join in on making fun of me. It didn’t take long for you to teach me that love has conditions. It cares about weight, money, and social standing, or at least the sorry excuse for what we call love does. Your actions left a hole that never truly went away. I’ve had body issues ever since. I’ve been paper thin and overweight, but never have I looked in the mirror and been satisfied. I still hear ghosts telling me I’m inadequate today.
   Hey you! I’m the dreamer you said was fooling himself. “Writing isn’t a career, and there’s nothing worth seeing anywhere besides in this location.” “Science and religion could never walk hand in hand.” “You won’t like that.” “No one does that.” Your closed mind and heart is an example of what a society full of drones carrying cell phones and going to the same location daily have become. We don’t dream, and we don’t really live. Anyone who dares to be different becomes delusional to you. You spew doubt all over a life that should be simple. You sneak into my most private thoughts and whisper to me - destroying everything there could have been for a person who needs anything but the small world you refuse to leave.
   Hey you! I’m still here. I’m still living life in a way that makes me proud and wishing the best on those who work in an industry that needs ALL the help it can get. I have ideas, and I have facts that back them up. I don’t shout like an ignorant buffoon. I listen and respond with educated thoughts and clear eyes. I’m still able to face a mirror even though your insecurity seeped into me so long ago. Can you say the same? As you stare at your children and pray that someone doesn’t treat them the same way and you look at the body that is now yours, do you understand what irony is all about? With your closed walls, are you happy? Do you ever think for yourself and wonder what new experiences could be out there? Are you secretly miserable, or is your head completely hollow?
   Hey you! Do you even care? Are you haunted, too? Do you see the damage you do, or is it all just everyday life for you? Is this your paradise - a world where we reward wrong and persecute those who try to stand above it all? I hope it’s not because it’s my hell. It’s the only one I’ll ever know. I’ll dream in this hell, live life the way I know to be right without hypocritical reasoning, respect those who dare to do the same, and condemn what I know in my heart to be wrong without fear of people lashing out.
   Hey you! I’m done with your world of lies and hypocrites. I’m rising above it all and becoming something better than I used to be.

   Hey you! How does it feel on the ground? From here all of your loud opinions and undeserved self-importance seem pretty small, as they always should have.

Saturday, June 21, 2014

Sex Sells

   Today I’m going to talk about something book related, but it’s not promotional. It’s just more of something I’ve noticed with other people’s writing. Most people feel that they need to have at least one smut scene in their books, and many people make books that revolve completely around one thing – sex. Now, I’m not here to bash anyone or to tell you what you should and shouldn’t read based on right and wrong. I just think that this trend is interesting. Most writers truly feel like they have to include a graphic sex scene to make the book complete and “adult."
   I differ on this opinion. I want my characters to be perceived a certain way, and while I can’t control how people picture them, I don’t want that image to be of the standard muscle man or pinup girl that you see on most covers. I want it to be of someone relatable, and I don’t want the love between my character to resemble the lust that we see in raunchier movies and books. That’s not love. It’s infatuation. I want my characters to be sexual beings, but I want my readers to focus on what’s really important about them, and honestly, the bedroom isn’t my highest priority. Take Trent and Ally from the Strange Visions series for example. Even if I had never implied that they slept together, you would still know that they love each other in a very deep way. I think that people miss this step. They go straight for how attractive parts of characters’ bodies are to another character while never establishing the lasting connection that we all crave in our real life relationships. Unfortunately, I don’t think this trend is going to change anytime soon, though. There’s a large audience for erotic and risqué writing. I’m a normal human being, and let’s be honest. I’m a man, so I understand lust and things like that, but I guess I just don’t understand why so many people put such an emphasis on making their characters such sexual beings or to read smut.
   I’m still young, so maybe I’m missing something here, but here’s what I’ve gathered about love and sexual relationships. If you’re looking for love, you’re not going to find it in a book. Men and women don’t react the way they do in love stories and erotic novels. You should try to find someone in the real world who might not take your breath away from the first time you see them, but instead, that will grow on you a little more every day. That’s the dream, isn’t it? Don’t you want to wake up and love the person lying next to you a little more every day? So why read or write about things that aren’t what you need? Any lasting relationship starts with a connection that goes past sex, and any great sexual relationship takes time to perfect, and expecting what you read in books or even reading to try to fill a void that can still be found in the real world is simply strange to me. You should write and read about what you want to see in your own life, and if that revolves around one thing, then you might have a problem whether you’re a man or a woman.
   Well, that’s my two cents on things. I’m not trying to criticize what anyone writes. I just think there are a lot of good writers out there who waste their incredible talent on something that could be so much more. Do yourself a favor today. If you write, reexamine why you started writing to begin with, and if you’re a reader who gets something out of your books that you can’t get in real life, put the book down, and go find exactly what you’re looking for. It’s probably not a good idea for an author to tell readers to put their books down, but I think we all get lost sometimes. We should write what we love and not what sells, and we should read what we love and not what we long for.

Saturday, June 14, 2014

Wrong and The Unseen

   I’m very proud to announce my next 5 projects. The first one coming out is Wrong Visions: A Collection of Short Stories Vol. 1. It will cover some of the time between the final chapter of Wrong End and the epilogue. These stories are about the everyday lives of some of my favorite characters, and it comes out on July 14th. Nathan and Sam will take center stage through two of the stories and share the spotlight with Trent and Ally through another. These three stories are truly short stories. There’s another story that could actually qualify as a book, however, and it stars not only Nathan, Sam, Trent, and Ally, but also Jason and Chloe. These stories are going to all be good, but the one starring everyone is my favorite. Let me tell you about my collection of short stories.
   First, we have Wrong Catch. Wrong Catch is a story about Nathan in his senior year of high school. As he struggles between choosing between his girlfriend and a game, he finds what really matters to him. This story gives new insight into why Nathan is the man he is today.
   After that we have Wrong Visions. Here’s the description for it. When Trent Roberts sees that his favorite author is going to be killed on a trip to New York, he does what he always does. He comes to the rescue. Unfortunately, Nathan and Sam might not be too receptive to the idea of a supposed psychic’s warnings. With action, romance, and comedy, this crossover is more than entertaining for fans of the two series.
   A story I really love is Wrong: The Christmas Gift. Have you ever wanted your partner to literally be willing to go to the ends of the earth to get you the perfect gift? Well, Nathan might just have to in order to get Sam what she deserves. As a sudden trip and a lot of secrecy make Sam feel insecure about what Nathan is doing, a lot of unexpected things will occur. This story combines the best charms of the Christmas season and the Wrong series, and at its core it’s a true love story.
   And finally, this is where we get into the meat of things. Wrong Visions: The Vacation packs everything into one story that I always wanted to do as a writer. In this much larger story, we see Trent and Ally come to visit Nathan and Sam in Hawaii at the same time as Jason and Chloe. As Nathan plans another surprise for Sam, they have to find a way to house more people than should be possible. Throughout the week, we’ll see Nathan and Sam make some tough decisions, Trent and Ally get involved in one more strange situation, and Jason help Chloe face her past head on. By the end of the week, everyone involved will be changed in one way or another, and bonds that are unbreakable will be formed. This is a feel good story about friendship, family, and love. Fans of both series will love it, and those who have always wanted to see Jason and Chloe step into a starring role will finally get their wish.
   That’s not all I have to announce in the Wrong department. I have written more short stories starring our favorite characters, and I’m in the process of writing another. There will be a Vol. 2 sometime in late September. I have no plans to write a Vol. 3, but I’m not going to lie to myself. I love these characters, so anything is possible. These books aren’t going to be spy or murder books. They’re simply about the characters we love. Personal relationships will be explored more in these stories.
   Now, on to a brand new set of books. I’m pleased to announce The Unseen: A Broken Mind. It’s a book about espionage that will be the start of a trilogy. I can’t give away too much just yet, but it comes out on August 28th, and it already has a sequel written that’s being edited as we speak. I would expect for everyone to see part two of The Unseen series in late October. It will be called The Unseen: Shadow Wars. I haven’t started on the third and final book in the series yet, but I hope to have it out in late December.
   So there you have it. I’ll be releasing Wrong Visions Vol. 1 July 14th, The Unseen August 28th, Wrong Visions Vol. 2 in late September, The Unseen: Shadow Wars in late October, and an untitled book in the Unseen series in late December. That’s my year. I don’t have any plans after that. I might have done everything in the writing department I want to do after The Unseen series wraps up, but if I know myself, I’ll have two or three more books planned by that time. Thanks for being patient while I got all my ducks in a row, and I hope you enjoy this year of books. I thought I was running out of ideas a few months ago, but it turns out that I had at least 5 more books in me. Thanks for reading. I can’t wait to share the actual work with you. Look forward to a lot of teasers as the release of Wrong Visions creeps closer.

Friday, June 13, 2014

The Truth

   It’s been on my heart to do something for a while now, and I’m going to do it today. I want to share the most intimate part of my life and invite anyone reading this to have what I have. I’ve been a Christian for a long time. Now, before you leave the room screaming, hear me out. I’m not here to tell you about how terrible your ways are, or how great mine are. As a matter of fact, I have more bad things about me than good, and chances are that you’re as good or better a person as I am. Accepting Christ didn’t make my life easier either. In fact, I have many more bad days than good ones. I struggle and feel an intense need to belong in a place where I never will. To put it simply, my life has been even harder since I accepted Christ. I want to share something with you, though. This singular thing makes all of it worth it.
   I once heard a man say that gay people and divorced people couldn’t go to heaven because no one who is actively living in a sin could possibly be a Christian. I won’t name who that man was, but he was someone who most people would consider a very knowledgeable and Godly man. I’ve always thought that he misunderstood salvation on the most basic level, though. I curse when I’m angry. Sometimes I throw out a curse word when I’m just telling a joke. I try not to, but in truth, I probably say at least one bad word every day of my life. I’m living in a sin, and honestly, I’m not doing as much as I should to get out of it. What makes me so different from a divorced or gay person? What makes a person who eats or drinks a little too much any different than these people? Now, don’t misunderstand what I’m saying. I believe all of the things I’ve just named are sins, but we get caught up in the actions of others too often. We think that some things are not redeemable. I’ve heard a lot of Godly men say things like this, and I think these men are confused. They don’t know their God as well as they think they do.
   Let me tell you about the God I know. He’s someone who can use former murderers for good, give divorced people who came the from terrible relationships the strength to forgive and find the love they always deserved, and put those lost in sexual sins back on the right path. He can give you strength to beat addiction and the empathy to understand those who feel they can’t. That’s not even the greatest thing He can do, though. God can love you even when you’re not trying to beat any of those things. He can see you as imperfect as you are and still love you. No parent can give you that love and no spouse will ever love you unconditionally. He sent His only Son to die for you. You see, back before Jesus came, people had to sacrifice to cover their sins. God can’t look upon sin, and the only way he could was with this sacrifice. Jesus died for us and became a lifeline straight to the Being who made us. There are no big conditions for gaining a relationship with your Creator either. All you have to do is believe that Jesus died for you and ask Him to cover the debt of your sin. Then you can have a daily relationship with your God. That doesn’t mean your days will get better or that you have a get out of jail free card from sin, but it does mean this. You’ll have a Father to talk to through all the joy and hardships in your life. You’ll have the most powerful Being in this universe listening to and caring for you, and when it’s all over, you’ll get to join your Father in heaven. It sounds like it couldn’t be that simple, but it is. I’ve explored every other option besides God in my life to try to see if there’s another explanation for the world around me, and this is the best one I can come up with. I know God’s love is real. It’s strange to say, but I can feel it every day.
   We focus on judgment a lot in the Christian community, but if you want a God who will never have anything but forgiveness and love for you, then reach out and ask for Him to be the key part of your life. I do stress this. Every relationship is a two way street. Saying a few words to God will NOT save you or give you the perfect life. Walking with Him daily will do that. The words are simply words. Without true feeling, belief, and commitment behind them, your words will ring hollow. If you’re ready to make God your life, so He can also make you His focus, then say these words, or some version of them, and truly mean them.
   God, I know I’m a sinner, and I’ll always be imperfect until the day I die, but I don’t want this burden anymore. I believe that you sent your Son to die for my sins. I want Jesus’s blood to cover them, and I want a relationship with You. Please bless me and use me daily for anything that glorifies You. Give me the strength to be more like Jesus moving forward, and thank You for this wonderful gift. In Jesus name I pray. Amen.

   I don’t know if anyone out there reading this has decided to accept Jesus as their Savior, and I know a lot of people might think this is strange for me to write. I usually write about books, but this is part of my journey. I had to share my faith and ask people to join me. If you’ve accepted Jesus or if you do in the future, know that life will be hard at times. It might be even harder than it used to be, but there will be a love and peace that surrounds you in your darkest moments that’s unexplainable. Welcome to the family, and I hope your walk with God is full of love, redemption, and most importantly, a realization that no one is beyond saving as long as God is allowed to do His work.

Wednesday, June 11, 2014

Call To Action

   I want to talk about something that isn’t popular today. When things like this are brought up, the words judging and tolerance are thrown around. I want everyone to know from the start that I’m not judging, but I’m aware enough to see the real world around me. I’m tolerant to those of us who need understanding, but I’m not blind to those who simply refuse to try. Maybe most importantly, I don’t preach anything that I’m not also preaching right back at myself. Now, let me get started.
   I need to get something off my chest that I’ve been thinking about for over a year. I have wanted to write about this from the start, but I’ve been discouraged from doing so for fear of how people would react. I no longer care about that, though. I believe some things need to be acknowledged for change to ever occur. I see a moral and mental decay happening all around me and even within myself. We live in a society that says things like, “Don’t worry. Be Happy,” “Be tolerant,” and “I’ve been forgiven by God.” All of these can be good things. Obviously you should try to be happy, be tolerant of the things that cannot be changed, and ask for forgiveness from God and the people you’ve wronged, but we’ve turned these things into get out of jail free cards. I don’t believe that’s what they were intended to be. Let’s examine our happiness, or from what I’ve seen, delusion.
   We all tend to want to believe nothing can ever happen to us or that we live in the best place in the world. How is this possible, though? I’ve seen scientific studies where they asked smokers what they thought their chances of getting cancer were. They usually replied with a statistic that was over twice as low as the real number. When they were told the chances of a cigarette killing them, they replied with delusional statements like, “not me.” Now, I’m not picking on smokers, but this is a good example of how we all act. We project that things are going much better than they are until it’s too late. In some ways, we lie to ourselves. We tell ourselves that we’ll never be the ones to get sick as our bodies get unhealthier by the day. We never see diabetes and heart problems coming in this country, even though we have a bigger chance of getting these diseases than any other place in the world. Our husbands look at porn, and our wives read erotica without ever thinking about the harm we’re doing to our relationships. We allow our desires to slowly but surely destroy our trust with our partners until the relationship dies, but we never for one second think that we could be the ones to get a divorce, even though our actions clearly say that we don’t even want to be in an intimate relationship with someone. We let friendships slip away and then wonder why we’re alone. We settle for a text message or a Facebook “like” when we could be having lunch with an old friend. We drift apart. As America’s education system slips further behind the world, we say the US is number one while never acknowledging that our children aren’t equipped to make us anything close to that in the future. Why? Why do we lie to ourselves? Some say it’s because we need to see delusions. If we didn’t, we would be overwhelmed. I say we should be happy, but it should be because we know we’re moving in the right direction, not because we’re always doing the easiest thing. Be health conscious, explore your inner desires with the person you married, learn to be a friend again, and for God’s sake, acknowledge that our future is the bleakest it’s ever been. This America is the worst one to grow up in for quite some time, and that is a shame. Our children’s children deserve better than we’ve been given. Unfortunately, without the acknowledgment that there’s a problem, I don’t believe anything will ever change.
   Let’s move on to the word tolerance. I love this word, but I hate the way we use it. You should be tolerant to those who cannot change, those who are misfortunate, and those who do things that you personally do not like but you know the issue lies with you. Where does tolerance stop, though? When does letting everyone lead us to a morally decaying society where anything is admissible stop? We see people today who promote things that poison the mind and body who are glorified for their actions. Women who overly sexualize themselves are said to be heroes while women who have the confidence to be attractive for everything they are on the inside and out without using sex as a tool are viewed as prudes. Why? Where is the value in a person who uses such a thing to get ahead in life? They use the emotions of men to move forward, and eventually, they even start to believe that their body is their number one tool instead of their mind. What about the men who sleep with multiple partners? We glorify a man who has many partners. It’s made into a fun joke, and at the end of it all, he gets to marry a decent person as if none of that ever happened. We never think about the people he hurt along the way or the trust he ripped away from women who would never truly trust another man. Our society simply says things like be tolerant of other peoples’ lifestyles. Why are we so quick to be tolerant of lifestyles that hurt the people around us? These things rip the trust out of the fabric of our relationships and make us into no more than mindless shells who use and abuse everyone around us but yet we’re taught to be tolerant. It makes no sense, and it never will. Be tolerant of those who cannot change, but stop glorifying or making excuses for the users of our world.
   The final one I want to talk about is forgiveness. We throw this word around in the Christian community like it’s a magic eraser that makes our actions disappear. I have bad news. It doesn’t. When you ask God or a loved one for forgiveness, they usually forgive you, but what good do those words do? When we apologize to our spouses only to learn nothing about our actions and to do the same thing over and over again, what meaning is there in the words? Why do we even bother to say them? The truth is we say them because gaining someone’s forgiveness makes us feel better about ourselves. There was never a plan to correct our behavior because in our society’s eyes, forgiveness is the key to restoration. I have bad news, though. You can never be truly sorry for an action until you have a course of action to change your behavior. What about Christians who say, “I’m forgiven?” I have no problem with someone saying that Jesus has forgiven them for their sins. This is what I have a problem with. All the time I see young people who have made countless mistakes. They’ve lied, cheated, fornicated, and been drunkards. They say they want to change their lives, though, so they ask God for forgiveness. The word born again virgin has even been thrown around. What do they do after they say a few words to God and make an announcement to the church? They go right back to their ways. They have sex, drink, and continue to use the well-intentioned people in their lives. After all, they’ve said they were sorry, and God will always forgive them, so why bother actually changing? This part can come off as judging, but that’s okay. Maybe we all need to hear things like this sometimes. I’m not perfect. I make mistakes daily, and some of the mistakes I make I might never apologize for. Do you know why? It’s because I don’t want to apologize for something until I’m truly willing to change it. To be sorry is to admit you’re wrong, but without action after that wrong, it is absolutely meaningless. This blog today is a call to action. Stop being delusional. There are things about all of us that cannot be changed, but there are very few of them. The greatest inventors, preachers, writers, and engineers of our world have refused to accept the mediocrity of this world and themselves. They’ve worked to improve themselves and refused to accept mediocrity for so long that the very culture around them changed into something better than it was before. Stop being blind to your failures and the people around you who aren’t carrying their weight. Have high expectations for everyone around you, including yourself. Only when you do this will you have a chance at having the life you deserve. Don’t accept those who use others either. They aren’t heroes. People who use sex, drugs, and threats of violence to control others do not deserve your understanding because their actions are beyond reason or morality. Finally, stop hiding behind the word sorry. An apology won’t erase an action. If you’ve done something wrong, live with the consequences. Some mistakes cause wounds that will never heal, but if you don’t do anything to stop the bleeding how will you ever know what could have been? If you hide behind your religion or an apology that means nothing, how will you know what a changed “you” could have been like? You felt guilt for a reason, and no, God is NOT a get out of jail free card. He will forgive you, but you still have to live with the effect your actions caused. People who you’ve wronged will not pretend that you never did anything even if they forgive you. It’s not their job or God’s to repair the damage you’ve done. An apology is only the first step in repairing that, and if you only said some words to ease your conscience, then there is no hope of redemption for you.
   Now, I know this blog seems bleak, but it’s really not. It’s a call to action. Fight for your health, marriages, friendships, and children. Stop being blind! This country is truly filled with the blind leading the blind, and it’s time for us to put a stop to that. Stop being tolerant to those who harm us, and maybe most importantly, stop letting words mean anything without actions. Let your actions be everything people need to know about you, and don’t forget to hold the people in your life to the same standard you hold yourself to. Only with personal responsibility, awareness, and a newfound moral obligation will we ever be able to be the people we were destined to be.

Saturday, June 7, 2014

Fitness

   I wanted to talk about something I’ve never written about before. I used to be obsessed with exercising and living healthy. In fact, I might have been a little too into it. I’ve found myself at the other end of the spectrum lately. Over the last two years, I’ve gained twenty pounds. Now, I know some people in my life would say that I needed to. I appreciate them being nice, but I can feel how my pants fit much snugger, and I know I don’t look the same. I also don’t have as much energy. I used to be able to jog as long as I wanted to. Now . . . not so much. I’m writing this to tell the world about a goal of mine. I want to lose those twenty pounds, and I want to do it fairly quickly. I’ve always been good at doing things when I put my mind to it, but I usually don’t put my mind to it until I tell someone what I’m planning to do, so here you go. I’m telling the world that Mitchel Grace is going to lose twenty pounds.
   You might ask what this has to do with books or my normal blogging subjects. It has nothing to do with books, but it’s definitely in the same category as everything else in this blog. I named this blog Finding My Niche for a reason. Most people said work at the bank. I wrote instead. Then people said everyone settles eventually. So what if you don’t think you can love someone like her? It’s time to settle down. I’m still waiting for someone who doesn’t make me feel like I’m settling because she’s exactly who I was meant to be with. People say now that I can’t afford to lose any weight. The word anorexic has even been thrown around. I’m openly saying that I like to be lighter. I feel better, and my athletic ability is off the charts when I’m in the 150s. That’s part of who I want to be. I want to be a writer who finds a person who is flawed but perfect for him, and I want my body filled with things that make it feel better and not worse. I want to know that I have the strength to defend myself from anyone and the stamina to run a marathon. I just added another goal to a long list of goals, but more than that, I found a place to stand. Most women like broad, and most men seem to respect someone who is slightly bigger. Here’s the thing, though, that’s not what I like or who I am. I’m going to start being who I am more in every area of life. Writing was the first area I found myself in. The control over my body and how I view it instead of allowing others to control that will be the second thing. That’s what I would want to tell anyone reading this more than anything. What you see when you look in the mirror is the most important thing. It doesn’t matter if someone says you’re too fat or skinny. The person you see just has to be okay with one person, and that’s you. I can apply that to every area of life. Stand for what you believe in, and be the person you feel like on the inside in front of the world. I know I will be from now on.

Monday, June 2, 2014

Fun

   I want to tell everyone about some of the things that give me a lot of joy. Most of them are things that people have told me I should quit at one point or another. I think life is a lot more about smelling the roses than growing up, though.
   First, I love my writing, as you all know. Here’s the thing about writing, though. It doesn’t always make a lot of money for you. Sure, there are the millionaire authors of the world, but here’s the real fact. There are thousands of writers out there who are very good at what they do. There are only a few multi million dollar authors. Most of us survive on far less than people realize. A lot of people have asked what I’m going to do with my future, and for a while, I actually started asking myself that question. Even if I loved writing, I was trying to plan out what the end of my writing career would look like and what I would move on to from there. In short, I already had one foot out the door. I realized something, though. Life isn’t about how much money you make. Writing gives me enough to survive and be happy. That’s enough for me. I love what I’m doing right now, and I’ve decided that I’m not going to stop doing it until I don’t enjoy it anymore. There are too few things in this world that can give you the thrill of escaping into a new reality full of new friends. I’m not willing to give that up right now, and truthfully, I might never be. I want happiness, and it’s the kind that money will never be able to buy.
   Secondly, I love video games. When I was younger, people told me that I would grow out of playing them. Now a lot of people act like a grown man playing a game is strange. I don’t really think there’s anything strange about it, though. When I’m stressed or I have a headache, I have a hobby that can immediately take me out of the moment. I can physically feel my blood pressure going down when I play games. I think we all need something like that. We’re too quick to leave behind the things we loved when we were young. It’s those things that keep us young, I think. Stress will age you faster than anything in this world, and the things that can eliminate mine are here to stay.
   Finally, I absolutely love competition. It doesn’t matter what kind of competition. I just love the rush of pushing myself to my limits physically or mentally. I don’t even care if I win. I just love the rush I feel and the accomplishment when I push my self beyond what I perceived as my limits. That sounds like a simple thing, but it’s really not. Many of us take the easy way out. We stop pushing ourselves and instead choose to take the path of least resistance. We take a job that’s steady but not challenging, surround ourselves with people who don’t challenge us to be better, and before we know it, life is easy, but it’s boring, too.

   All of these things have something in common. I like to compete like a kid, go to pretend worlds, and do some activities that many would consider a little immature. I think I have the maturity of a much older man in a lot of areas, but I know I have the soul of a much younger person. I think that’s a good thing, too. I’ll never be quick to let go of the things I love. They’re what make me who I am. Without the things that give me joy, I would be tense and angry all the time. Many of us are. They say life is complicated and that being an adult isn’t fun. I tend to disagree with all of that. Life is what you make it, and age is a number that has as much meaning as you let it have. Life can be as complicated as you make it. If you want a lot of money, people who are always agreeable, and friends who are so refined that your social life looks like something off of a reality show full of rich people, then you can have it all for a price. That price will be leaving behind a lot of the things and people you loved. I don’t want that life, though. I heard a quote once, and I think it rings true. It’s how I want to live my life. “A lot of trouble can be avoided by living a simple life.” That’s all I want. I want my simple job where I probably don’t make as much as I feel I should, my simple hobbies, and people who aren’t perfect for anyone but me. I’m not willing to leave my uncomplicated and fun life behind yet. I may never be able to, and I think that’s exactly how it should be.