Finding Hope In A Game

   Recently the state of Mississippi has been at the forefront of news in college football. I know what you’re thinking. You’re probably tired of hearing about how Ole Miss and Mississippi State beat Alabama and Texas A&M. After all, most people are. In a way, even I am, and I’m here at the center of it. I heard someone say that we needed to act like we had been here before. That’s good advice, but here’s the thing. We haven’t been here before. I want to explain why this is a big deal to the people of Mississippi and why it’s such a big deal to me.

   First, let’s look at Mississippi’s history. We’re known for division in race more than any singular thing. We have a dark history, and in recent years, there has been a lot of debate on what to do about that. Some say we should sweep it under the rug and let time slowly heal all wounds. Others say that ignoring it will do nothing. They believe we need to learn from the past. Then there are those who don’t believe anything has to change at all. Have I said that there’s some division here? Then there are the issues that are most pressing in today’s world. We’ve been rated as one of the most illiterate, obese, corrupt, and drug filled states in the nation. After someone tells you for so long that you’re going to be fat, stupid, and that your leaders are ripping you off, you start to believe them. You start to think there’s no future at all for you. Since I could remember, I’ve been plotting a way to get out of Mississippi. It wasn’t that I didn’t like some people here or that I thought it was the worst place in the world. It was just that I didn’t see a future here for myself. No one did. We’re the poorest state in the nation, and we have absolutely nothing to cheer for. We have no professional sports teams, and no one is alive who remembers the last time State or Ole Miss actually won anything meaningful. That changed on Saturday, though. We all saw something that we might not see for another 50 years. We’re all trying to be optimistic that this run by both teams could continue for the rest of the year and spark a new attitude in Mississippi sports, but there’s a part of us that has been beat down for so long. That part tells us that this moment is fleeting. We need to enjoy it to the fullest right now. Cue tearing a goal post down and going crazy over the biggest weekend in Mississippi sports history. I’m not saying that it couldn’t have been handled with more class, but I am explaining something very important. We haven’t had hope in a long time. Yes, I know it’s just a game, but something that truly surprised us happened Saturday, and if that could happen, who knows what others surprises could be waiting?

   I want to explain things from my perspective now. I don’t care about these two teams as much as everyone else here. I view it as a game. I’m happy, but it’s not the most important thing to ever happen. Here’s the thing, though, despite it only being a game, it has given me something that I didn’t have before. I’ve been dealing with a lot of things in my life that have been pushing me away from the person I need to be. I’m trying to be a good person, and I’m trying to keep my faith intact, but over the last few months, I’ve been tested more than I felt like I could handle. I’ve lost friends, discovered things I would have never believed, been blindsided by things that I still don’t understand, and I’ve had a loved one recently get sick. This week has been the tipping point. It feels like I’ve lost almost everything. A few months ago I had good friends, and things were starting to come together. I was doing the right things, and it felt like I was being rewarded for it. Now, it feels like no good deed goes unpunished, and the more I pray and try, the worse things get. Finding out that someone I loved was fighting for their life this week was enough to make me doubt everything about who I’ve been and where I’m going. I was already shaken, but now I’m truly scared of what new hell might come next. Here’s the thing. A game transitioned into something else for me Saturday. I had no doubt that both teams would fail like they always do. Was it a miracle that we both won? I don’t know. Maybe we were just better, but I do know this. Everything changed for two programs in one moment. I had forgotten that things like that could happen. Everything can change for you in one moment. I can’t say that I feel good about where things are or that I think things are magically going to get better either. I feel confused by why I’m going through this - why the people I love have to suffer. Still, I’m going to keep being me and doing the right things. As two teams showed the nation Saturday, hard work, faith, and determination do eventually pay off. I’m going to believe that a loved one fighting for their life will win that fight, that God takes some friends away for a reason, and that someday every good deed, intention, and act of love will be returned.

   That’s all I have to say about two games that were nothing more than just that - games. They gave us hope, and they gave me enough strength to move on when I felt like I couldn’t anymore. Here’s to hoping that MSU and Ole Miss continue their run, but more than that, I hope we all remember in this state what it was like to feel hope, happiness, and like anything was possible for a day.